When Disagreement Becomes Trauma

In the end, reason always wins because it is reality. It merely takes time. But our species is capable of spectacular heights of self and mass delusion.


Truer words were never spoken. There is a neurosis that is built in to the monkeys.

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Well, I’m the worst kind of racist-sexist-homophobe on the planet, and I understand the problem as the consequence of “women in the public square.”

The public square was created by men for men where they could indulge in their Culture of Insult. The Culture of Insult issues from the instinctive knowledge among men that men are expendable.

But as women have entered the public square over the last century and more they have undermined the public square’s Culture of Insult. This is because women have a Culture of Complaint. The Culture of Complaint issues from the instinct among women that they expect to be protected. When a woman experiences herself as unprotected she experiences trauma. Women do not generally indulge in direct debate; instead two women talking together will complain about a third person. My Girl George Eliot wrote that many women complain in order to be soothed.

If you read the wokey screeds they all assume that the helpless ones are not up to the rigors of the public square where their ideas might be challenged, and that any attempt to hold the helpless ones to any kind of standard is unjust.

Sorry to be such a monstrous racist-sexist-homophobe.

A while ago Ella-B taught me that women also have a Culture of Kindness. Men also have a Culture of Courage.


Not quite in those words though. A culture of cooperation & reciprocity would be more like it. And much of human flourishing has been built on cooperation. Try & get things done in the home & workplace without being cooperative & see how far you get…


That’s ok. But you do challenge orthodoxy on several points. Indeed women do expect to be protected and men do know they are expendable. Much can be explained by that.

That’s a bit self-flattering. Women are certainly better at pretending to have such a culture, but one only has to witness a cat fight to know how quickly that culture can evaporate. In fact most of civilization’s largest cooperative projects have been run by men who are less superficially kind to each other, but also less likely to be catty and bitchy and treacherous.


Apparently quite far, if we’re to believe that the world was governed by the “patriarchy” for millennia until the advent of feminism. Empires were built and great art was produced… Either that or there was more cooperation between the sexes than feminists would now care to admit. Like many positions espoused by the left, a thing cannot be both ways at once.


I never said men didn’t employ cooperation in their pursuits & let’s not forget gendered traits are shared rather there’s a strong presence of it in women’s.

One of the first things that happens when children commence schooling is mothers start organising friendships with other mothers & it’s not out of kindness but utility. Sharing knowledge & socialising children is achieved in such ways. Mothers whose parenting poses a risk to their children & by extension the others are the object of gossip & isolated. This kind of censure isn’t out of hatred but utility too.

Try to discuss politics at a mothers lunch & see what happens. Confrontation isn’t conducive to cooperation so you will rarely get any takers. There’s evolutionary reasons why women aren’t into discussions about politics in public or when they censure others.

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Supposing that kindness and utility happen to flow together? Why try to separate them?

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I have mediated many, many political disputes between mothers at PTA meetings in the school where I am the principal. Politics become increasingly relevant after the very youngest years of schooling. Over time, the utility of cooperation fades and the ferocity of competition takes its place. Asian society is cooperative to a point. After which, it is hyper-competitive and the political becomes the personal.


Or maybe truth doesn’t emerge from contradiction, but merely suffocates there…
Facts not in evidence here.
That’s where truth would emerge.

Yes there are competing utilities. But I suspect social ones are of just as much importance if not more so in western cultures where ‘lobbying’ for individual interests is more likely done covertly under the cover of darkness. :wink:
And let’s not forget that they aren’t necessarily mutually exclusive. One can still ‘take care’ of competing interests without risking social isolation.

That was awesome. Never thought about it that way, it’s an eye opener. Hehe we men see things in the distance but fail to see what’s right under our noses. Thank you for this post.


I was just surprised by the use of the word “mothers” when the term is actually “birthing persons”.


When they are not in church or not paying attention even the wokest will slip back into reality. The amount of mental energy it must take to stay within the fantasy at all times is surely exhausting for the full-time wokie who dare not make a mistake. In Oceania the comparable mistake would be forgetting that we have always been at war with EastAsia, or being foolish enough to answer ‘4’ when asked what 2+2 equals.


When disagreement becomes a chance to have an adult, civilized, discussion where 2 people give each other the chance to defend their own position, and calmly explore the other’s.

When Shapiro plays to his crowd and takes on his rabid Daily Caller persona, he’s a bit much for me. But there is no denying he is an extremely well read and well informed conservative who follows clearly delineated principles. And I find his Sunday Special hosting style unimpeachable. Polite, gracious, more than willing to give his guest (sometimes someone he deeply disagrees with, like a Maher, or a Harris) plenty of air time to flesh out their arguments.

When Maher plays to his crowd on Real TIme, and drops some of the pablum for part of his base, that can be pretty cringy as well. But he’s also not shy about giving time and space to people who he disagrees with, again to let them state their case, rather than to extract a cheap soundbite. The interviews are great, New Rules is great…but sometimes the panel is less useful. I’ve yet to check out his podcast, but plan to.

It didn’t seem that long ago that 2 intelligent people having an hour long discussion on air would not be all that noteworthy, even if the conversation was worthwhile. These days, such convos are endangered species.

I think Maher frames it in a way I can deeply relate to. His politics haven’t changed, but the woke left has gone completely ape-poop.


What. The. F. Is. Wrong. With. Canada?

Well, it’s not everyone in Canada. As we saw in January, there are some truckers who are still sane.

But still. This is just nuts.

No graves were ever found, no bodies dug up and catalogued, let alone examined for DNA to determine whose they might have been. But you must believe, and you can’t even question, just because.

Stasi couldn’t have done it better.


I’m waiting for the NBA and NFL to be declared systemically racist for having proportionately too many black players. But I’m not holding my breath.


The abject hysteria, the conspiracy theorizing, the emerging primacy of narrative over factual analysis and the quasi-religious, authoritarian and neo-clerical dogma that has surrounded identity politics generally, involving all traditions and political tendencies across the old Western world, are not normal behaviors that one might expect from ordinarily rational, stable and secure people.

They are emblematic of a severe crisis and cultural power struggle that started to come to a head when a certain Donald Trump, supported by a radically disaffected hinterland constituency of working-class hayseeds and fundamentalists, ascended to the Presidency in 2016.

This sent the postmodernist trained humanities administrators of the means of social reproduction and administration into an unprecedented panic in the face of what seemed to them to be a president and supporters, who appeared to have abandoned their (the administrators) version of reality, that they had assiduously entrenched over a protracted period…and had always assumed to be incontrovertibly true, ‘progressive’ and irreversible.

It was a traumatically shocking realization. It sent The Ascendancy into a blind collective panic that would quickly turn truth into truthing, accompanied by a ruthless purge of dissenters in their own ranks and a cross system sets of institutional attack on the reproductive/sexual and civilizational underpins of their enemies, that rapidly spilled onto the streets.

Johnathon’s critical review of the perversions of this response is as efficient as it is devastating, but they just aren’t, nor are they meant to be rational or represent a ‘reasonable’ movement.

What he is describing is a coup and any ammunition will do. It does not need to make sense, any more than the problem of the ‘Jewish Question’ in Nazi Germany did, because if it felt right, it was right, and anyone who challenged it was a Jew Lover and Aryan hater.

And the rest is history, which is why I would suggest that these absurd and noxious skirmishes instituted by the Wokes against their enemies are but a casus belli on the road to war, where it is the Ukrainians who are the fascists, not the Russian invaders, who are ‘liberating’ the country.

In any impending war, the truth is always the first casualty


I think depths would be more a propos than heights in this context.